Room 7 did a piece of writing about a photo of a boat being attacked by an alligator. We used the five senses to help structure our writing. Tez edited them while we published them. Our next step is to self edit or to add more description or language features.
I seen an alligator eating my boat with its revolting teeth. I hear the boat rocking in fear. I hear myself screaming in fear. I feel scared and frighted with fear. I smell the revolting breath of the alligator in my face. I taste salt water in my mouth. It tastes like fear.
I see horror in session. I see danger behind me. It is very horrifying and heart breaking. I hear jaws opening and closing with anger. I hear the ocean and the boat zooming out to sea. I feel torture and the alligator biting me with blood spewing out of me. I smell fear and big things happening. I also smell the alligator's breath - it smells like rotten garbage. I taste blood on me and in my mouth. It tastes disgusting.
I see the jaws of death and salt water. I hear myself screaming in horror. I also hear the alligator snapping its teeth together. I feel scared. I also feel big, scaly skin from the alligator. I smell salt water and the fish smell from its breath. I taste death. I also taste red blood.
I see my boat and me against an angry alligator. My life flashes before my eyes. I see my nets, fish and knife. I hear jaws snapping, as it breaks my boat's motor. My heart goes to the beat - 365 beats a minute. I heard a ripping sound as the alligator easily rips my best net. I feel the wooden boards of the bottom of my boat as I faint in horror. Later I feel a bruise on my head. I get out the knife that my grandad gave me. It's blade, as always, is cold and smooth. My net feels normal as I toss it out to try and catch the alligator. I smell the salt of the sea, a smell I never liked. Now, it smells like death. I taste my lunch and think, "Will this be my last meal? Will I become a meal to the alligator who stalks me? Eyes above the water?"
I see my arm in an alligator's sharp, fine teeth, that resemble the blade of a fine sword. I hear the crunch of my bones, as they break from sharp teeth of that foul beast. I feel dead in the pitch black of the alligator's rough, scratchy belly. I smell an alligator's breath mixed with sea salt. Its breath was as foul as all bad things I've ever smelt. I taste alligator saliva all over me, more sticky than glue.
I see big jaws coming closer to me. I am running to the other side as fast as I can. Is this the end of N****a the Great? I feel wobbly and scared I'm worried I'm going to fall off the boat. I smell less danger as I move away from the deadly alligator. I hear myself screaming in horror with an alligator attacking me. I taste death and blood in my mouth as I make my way across the boat.
I see the sharp teeth of the alligator trying to bite me. I hear myself screaming like a baby and the alligator's stomach rumbling. I smell the salty ocean water and my bright red blood. I taste death and also the alligator's slimy saliva. I feel the alligator biting my head off and leaving me in the ocean to die.
I see big jaws with long sharp teeth. The alligator looks like he has about 20 million teeth! I hear my high pitched, ear piercing scream. I feel scared and I feel the rough scaly skin from the alligator, like I'm going to die. This is the end, I'm never going to see my beloved Maisy ever again. I smell salt water from what is surrounding me and some that's in my boat from the big splash that the deadly alligator made. I taste the bitter salty blood from when I bit my tongue when I first saw the alligator attack me.
I see my head in the alligator's mouth. I hear the snap of the alligator's big jaws and its big teeth. I feel helpless, because it can tip the boat over, then I'm dead because I can't swim. I smell fishy breath coming from the alligator because it has just eaten. I taste the salt water and the taste of the alligator's saliva.
I see my life is in danger by the alligator. It is going to tear me apart forever. I see its teeth trying to eat me. They are very sharp, like knives waiting to tear me apart from top to bottom. I hear my scream so loud that I couldn't say anything on the phone. Next, I heard the alligator getting ready to eat me apart. I feel the alligator's mouth and germs coming at me. Now I feel so, so scared. Everytime it comes closer, I feel even more scared. NOW, I feel the life coming out of me. I smell the blood of my body getting torn apart by this alligator who will make sure I'm dead. I smell the salt water and more alligator beneath me. I taste the blood of my tongue and body in danger from this alligator. I taste the very nice air, which I'm never ever going to taste again.
I see the light, next to the stairway to Heaven, as God is holding a golden gate open for me. I see some friends from the past like my aunty Alice and my dad. I couldn't wait to go through the gate to heaven but I woke up and thought I must have been knocked out from the alligator's ugly face.
I feel the water splashing in my face and a tingling felling in my spine. There's salt water making my eyes sting but not barely as scary as the alligator eating me! I feel like running, but it's now no use, I'll just tip the boat. I can't swim because my toe has been bitten off - cleanly off like a guillotine and a head.
I smell blood on the alligator's teeth off my left arm. I definitely don't know how Steve Irwin did his job, but its breath definitely takes over the blood smell. It smells like a shark it must have been its victim before me. If it was a great white, I definitely don't have a chance against this monstrous ugly green alligator.
I taste the salt water as I'm suffering from its jaws on my foot; blood is all around me, in the water attracting more predators as I yell "Help!" But no one can hear me. As the blood of my foot is going everywhere another alligator tasted it and said to his friends theres a delicious feast up on the top of the water.
I hear the snapping jaws of the alligator and its friends and family as I try to hit the creature with my machete it moves out of the way, so I fall in. I rip the motor of the boat and use it to pull me to shore. I yell to a bystander to ring an ambulance.
